"fax them?", he asked, in that are you kidding or an idiot kind of voice, "you want to know if i can fax them? i threw away my fax machine years ago, that's not how it's done any longer! i'll scan them in and send PNGs in an e-mail." well, i never possesed a fax machine. i would have had to dig out my old modem, find drivers for it and figure out how to receive a fax with it. but i thought it would have been apropriate for wiring diagrams of the standard hardware used to transfer software between 2600 cartriges and music casettes. PNGs! oh dear.

have you ever bought a shotgun at wal-mart?

i like the idea of using legacy hardware for tasks it still handles very well. when i first read "RU 486", i thought, "yes, i am!".

i need a minestrone now.

first george turned pale, then he gasped for air, then he turned red, and finally he said, "everyone come here immediately, we have to work out how we can blame this on saddam!"

36 hours later, remains of all seven astronauts had been found on eBay.

now that structured programming is in use for over 3 decades, we should be about ready for structured information.

create a creator who is not intelligently designed, but able to create intelligently designed things.

this afternoon i almost told heesters that the old fuck should fuck the fuck off; just in time i luckily realised that i was muddling him up with heston. however, i would have loved to see his face.

ever since time-sharing systems are in use, it is known that people that are suited for operating and administrating them are mostly intellectually over-specialised nerds, whose personality traits are commonly linked with autism and asperger's. this link would explain why it are almost exclusively men for whom talking to machines feels more natural than talking to other persons. in job interviews in the 20^th century, it was common to determine an applicant's qualification by asking, among other things, wheter he had a girlfriend. the job criteria for modern day paraplex operators are much harder to fulfill, but still very similar. their euphemistically termed 'cerebral stimulators', or dunce caps, as they call them much more to the point, are devices that use strong magnetic pulses to essentially temporarily switch off certain parts of their brains. the desired effect is to artificially evoke symptoms of the savant syndrome and drastically increase speed, accuracy and information recall capabilities, but only a small percentage of the population can get into the zone by disabling their language and social skills and get a certificate to that effect in one of the parastim training centers. the testing procedure only takes half an hour, but you shouldn't plan anything else of importance within the following 24 hours, during which you really can't rely on your short term memory.